Wide Awake and Dreaming

Even 13 years after his passing, my friend Brian’s spirit continues to remind me of the hope that is in the world. His love for life was contagious and his passion for music was beautiful to witness. Some of my favorite memories of him were when we didn’t have any plans which was most of the time because, well… college. We sat on the floor of his room, writing songs, singing, laughing and playing guitar. Most of the time, I would listen and watch him create. I loved to just be in the same room with him while he figured out his songs. He had a way with lyrics and melodies, which made it really fun to write music together.

A lifetime ago, and yet there are memories that seem recent and clear. I hear his voice in my head every now and then, his laughter, certain phrases he would use, an inside joke. But even these are fading slowly…like that old favorite song from years passed. You knew every word and recognized each note, but now you struggle to even remember the melody. The tune is beginning to escape you. The words have long gone. It’s scary to forget. But we do. We are only human, after all.

While going through some college stuff last year, I found a CD of a song Brian recorded during his last summer. It helped me to remember, even though it was hard to listen to because I had not heard his voice in over a decade. It is such a great song and I thought it deserved to be heard by more people. I had the privilege of watching this song develop in various apartments around the AU campus. I was there when he wrote it and hearing the words today have a new meaning for me. The chorus is an anthem to live your life in such a way that when someone mentions your name, their first thoughts are of person who lives graciously, generously and joyfully. This song is a good reminder to love fully and dream passionately.

If I never told you, I am telling you now. Thank you, Brian for the reminder to live with my heart fully open, to take risks and never stop dreaming. You are missed and your memory lives in everyone who knew and loved you…

You stand and open the door
with no idea what’s in store
hey, hey
hold on, hold on
what would they say
what would they write
if we told them we might
sail away above the waves
into the northern lights
Shine a star upon the world
so everyone could believe
we will always be
wide awake and dreaming

Click the link below to listen to Brian’s song:
Wide Awake and Dreaming



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