Mommy Musings

Mommy Fail

So…yesterday was my first big “mom fail” of the summer. My husband has been out of town all week and the girls have been completely insane. COMPLETELY. They won’t stop fighting, arguing, bickering and whining. At one point, I thought if I snuck out maybe they wouldn’t notice and they could just fight it out. I’m kidding. Kinda.

By the end of the day yesterday, I was wiped. I had a lymphatic drainage massage that morning to try and rid my body of the bacteria or whatever is going on while I’m taking antibiotics. Something is causing my lymph nodes to be painfully swollen lately. It sounds totally disgusting but it was just a really good neck/head massage, a little painful but definitely helpful. The rest of the day, I was dizzy and exhausted. I couldn’t eat anything all day. We got home after lunch time and all I wanted to do was pass out in my comfy bed for about twelve hours. Okay, I would have settled for one hour. Even twenty minutes. But that didn’t happen. If you know my girls, you know they DO NOT understand what you mean when you say, “Use your inside voice.” We are in a small space so I am at their mercy. They are loud and very expressive. (Expressive meaning singing in glass shattering octaves of the same lyric over and over and over and over…) You get the idea.

Yes, so that was my day…ALL day. By dinner time, I was not patient with them. I was short fused, hungry and tired. After growling and barking through dinner and bath time, I was feeling pretty terrible about how the day had gone. After they got out of the bath, I pulled them close and asked them to forgive me. I apologized for not being the mommy they needed all day. I explained how tired I was but that it wasn’t an excuse. I shouldn’t have barked. With little wet heads and bodies in my lap smelling of coconut shampoo we sat down in a heap on my bed, cuddled and read books together. And they gave me grace. Children are so quick to give forgiveness. I have so much to learn from them.

Then, it happened. I got my baby girl’s Kindergarten school supply list in the mail. She asked if she was going tomorrow. No, sweet one but too soon. At breakfast today, big C lost yet another tooth. I think that makes seven. Seeing her excitement and giddiness over this made me forget all about our crazy week.

Well, yes. As a matter of fact, I did need a good dose of perspective. Thanks!

For all you mommies out there dealing with the day in and day out of child rearing, loving and craziness this summer…I feel your pain. It is a massive undertaking. Know that you are not alone. Sometimes, it is so hard to see the sweetness of these moments when they are clouded with the dust of everyday life. To be terribly cliché, “This too, shall pass.” And we will look back and wonder where these little faces disappeared to.

4 thoughts on “Mommy Fail

  1. DeAnne, as you know my “babies” are now 20 and almost 17. On one hand it seems like only yesterday they were little like your girls, and you were their baby sitter! Yet on the other hand, it seems like such a long time ago that they snuggled with Mommy after bath time smelling like coconut shampoo. I miss that SO much!! I know it is physically exhausting when they are little, and harder for you with all you are going through with your health, but from a mom looking back on those days, even the hard ones, I assure you they really are all precious. Just want to encourage you to continue finding the blessings in each day with your sweet little girls! It goes so fast!! Love you!

  2. DeAnne,
    You have such a beautiful gift for expressing your profound thoughts. You are such a great Mother……Daddy and I prayed for you yesterday after we spoke to you on the phone. It burdens us to be so far away, but again…The Lord has shown us over and over that He knows, He is able, He cares and His Grace is sufficient. We loved our time with Chloe and Cammie and look forward to seeing the again next week.
    I echo Debbie’s words…..wish I could have said it that well…Thanks Debbie, for your encouragement…
    Blessings to both of you Moms, as you go through uncharted paths with Jesus leading the Way….kk

  3. Debbie – Thank you so much for the comment! Your encouraging words mean so much to me. I do treasure these days!! Thank you for being such an amazing example to me! You were always the kind of godly mother and wife that I wanted to be like during all those years of babysitting for your sweet boys. Thank you for that!! Love you and Mark very much!!

    Mama – thank you. 🙂 love you. We miss you too!!

  4. (And it goes without saying, that I always looked up to you as an awesome mommy! Thank you for also being an example of that to me !)

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